Thursday, August 24, 2017

Let them live

I'm not one of those moms who hangs on to summer for all it's worth.

I actually try to be.

I'm not.

I'm actually just as giddy as they are for the first day of school.

I await it with eager anticipation. For that moment to watch my kiddos run up to school, greet friends, turn back, and (with surprising loudness) yell "I LOVE YOU MOOOOMMM!"

It wasn't always this way. I cried the first day...possibly week...maybe more...dropping them off at preschool, and even kindergarten. But this year, I almost made a paper chain to count down the days.

Do I love them less than those who want them by their side constantly? I had a little mom guilt about how excited to send them to school I was. Until the first day of school came, and I was just as excited for them to come back from school and hear all about it.

I was excited to make cookies and excited to hear about their conquers and their fails.

I've decided, after all we've learned over the past two years about the damage Husband's parents have done, that I want my kids to live. I want to be a part of it, but I do not want to control it.

I want to share the happy and embrace the sad, but I do not want to own the happy and erase the sad.

Their lives are theirs to live, and I'm so proud to watch them run up to that school, and I'm so happy they run just as fast back to me...but no way do I want to chain them back from either of those things.

Live kidlets. Enjoy life and live...and eat cookies!

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